Last night marked the seventeenth anniversary of the day I kissed Ginger for the first time. We were sitting on the steps outside her dorm at the U of O and I said "I'm going to kiss you now" and I did.
As anniversaries are wont to do, it got me thinking about where my life would be today if not for Ginger. I offer up that I couldn't begin to imagine. How the hell can I actually put my self back in the shoes of my younger self and trace out some sort of plausible trajectory? I can't. But I also can't imagine that my life would be any better than it is today. As I was walking and thinking of any way that life could be better, several notions occurred to me - I could have won the lottery for instance - but each notion was rejected as insufficient to improve on having Ginger's love. I wouldn't trade it for money, the idea seems bizarre to me. There could be no other woman. Not one that so fucking accepts the mess I can be. Hell, most of you have trouble taking me in two hour doses, can you freakin' imagine putting up with me for seventeen years? And I am nothing. This is old hat for you all, because you have heard me tell the tale so many times, but, as you know, the most amazing thing in the world to me is that when my mom was dying and Amber needed a home, this woman, this amazing twenty-three-year-old woman who was having so much trouble trying to put up with me, working a crappy job in a city she hated, automatically reached out and said yes to a lifetime of raising my half-sister. And then set about dedicating her life to making sure that that girl knew every single moment of her life that her new mom loved her dearly and always would.
Seventeen years and I have not done anything to deserve a day of it. How could I possibly contemplate my life any other way? Ginger is so much of who I am, me without her is impossible. To contemplate, to exist. Not what, but how? How could I be without her in my life?
So, not that you didn't all know this already, I thought I'd let everyone know that I am the luckiest guy on the planet and I love Ginger H. I hope that she will always do me the honor of loving as well.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
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5 comments:
I'm not crying... no, I swear, I've just got something in my eye.
* sniff *
Congrats, you two crazy lovebirds!
I, on the other hand, am actually, seriously crying. That's beautiful, Dave. Ginger is a lucky woman.
awwwwwww. Happy Anniversary!
For the record, I * did * actually get a little misty-eyed, but chose to express it in the tried-and-true ways in which I've been gendered. But that does get lost somewhere between the actual wiping away the tear and the keyboard, no?
Sniff. I cried too! I am lucky and I will always love you as well.
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