I always enjoy the AV Club's Least Essential Albums of the Year. Many, many people spend a decent portion of their lives telling me of my shit taste in music, but at least I can appreciate what's crap!
Vanilla Ice, Vanilla Ice Is Back!: Hip Hop Classics
As one of the first, and worst, white rappers, Vanilla Ice nearly smothered the art form in its crib, and since then, he’s spent much of his career attempting to finish the job. Ice Is Back: Hip-Hop Classics features the nth comeback attempt by the now 41-year-old Rob Van Winkle, and it’s far and away the most unforgivable thing he’s ever done, far surpassing other crimes against humanity like Cool As Ice, “Ninja Rap,” and Hard To Swallow. This time out, he does wretched covers of classic rap songs, including “You Gots To Chill,” “Insane In The Brain,” and in an extended middle finger to the entirety of black culture, “Fight The Power” and “Buffalo Soldier.” Although it claims to be produced by someone named Adam Hamilton, Vanilla Ice Is Back! features beats and sounds straight out of a karaoke machine, and as if to absolutely cement the dismal amateurishness of it all, the retro-ish cover looks like it was incompetently Photoshopped by a friend of Van Winkle’s who works at a copy shop. It’s irony from someone who doesn’t get irony.
6 comments:
if being "fat" is your only flaw, you must be flawless! (i mean, unless you've put on like 30 pounds since i saw you last month.)
and as for getting shit about your taste in music: remember, for hipsters it's not just about the music. much of their enjoyment comes from having "superior" tastes to poor, musically unenlightened souls such as yourself. without the smug and superior feeling that knowing you affords them, they'd just have to just, i dunno listen to the music or something. that would be tragically, tragically boring.
Ash...riding to my rescue as always! If Wobs had managed to get his ass down to NC, he could have proved you wrong with his tales of the summer of crunk.
and I hate Sonic Youth.
You would assume that I consider your crunkness to be a flaw. If you'd subjected me to that "Punk Does Crunk" album, however, I'd have to reconsider.
I'll ignore your baiting us with the SY comment, although I understand it's heartfelt.
you've no flaws, uncle. only occasions for Bits.
dave, you know i love you, but the sonic youth hating is just over the line.
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